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If you've found out your partner still masturbates or even caught them self-pleasuring, you might be worried about what this means for your sex life and your relationship. Masturbation comes with a fair share of stigma and miseducation especially female masturbation and self-pleasure and so many of us naturally feel threatened by the concept. Whether you're worried it means your partner doesn't find you attractive anymore, would rather wank than have sex with you, or they have a sexual desire that's not being met in your sex life, please know masturbation - even in a relationship - is perfectly healthy and normal.
What's more, it can also be really, really hot. Still not convinced?
Read on. Despite the stigma and misconceptions surrounding masturbation - where a person stimulates themselves sexually, whether by hand or using sex toys - masturbation is normal for people of all ages, gender identities and sexualities.
And it can be good for you both as a couple, too,' says sex educator for Tengawriter, and broadcaster Alix Fox. Whether you're single, casually dating or in a long-term monogamous relationship, masturbation should be a healthy part of your life. There are many reasons why people masturbate, including:. We shouldn't naturally feel threatened when a partner masturbates. But if you notice a change in your sex life and are unhappy with it, or if you feel your partner isn't engaging in couple sex as much, Moyle says it's worth discussing this with them.
Thanks to stigma, shame and misinformation, masturbation has a bad rep.
A global survey of over 10, people by Tenga found just 17 per cent of British women learned about masturbation during sex education lessons. Some of us may also worry that if our partner masturbates, they aren't fulfilled by partnered sex with us.
Some of us may also worry that if our partner masturbates, it's a they don't want or aren't fulfilled by partnered sex with us, but this is usually not the case. This may be why so many of us aren't truthful about how often we masturbate when our partners ask. According to the Tenga research, 38 per cent of men and 34 per cent of women have lied about their masturbatory habits, while 37 per cent have avoided talking to their partner about it at all. If your partner still enjoys solo sex on occasion, it's unlikely to be a that they're no longer attracted to you.
They might have a high sex drive or simply enjoy the release. But why would they choose to masturbate instead of having sex with you? While it might make you feel left out or confused, if your partner still masturbates regularly alongside enjoying sex with you, it actually comes with a of health benefits:. Masturbating can make someone better at partnered sex, and make them enjoy sex in a couple more, too. A common misconception is that people should only masturbate when they're younger and before they're in a healthy, fulfilling sexual relationship.
Medications increasingly prescribed to treat depression such as Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitors SSRIs are known to lower sexual desire and cause absent or delayed orgasm in many people. Tenga's research found an increasing of people are beginning to view masturbation as an important part of looking after themselves. The more you engage in physical stimulation, the more you train your body to want it and anticipate it, says Dr Shirin Lakhani, women's intimate health expert and founder of Elite Aesthetics. Masturbation ultimately le to the release of neurotransmitters like serotonin, endorphins, and oxytocin which bring a feeling of calm as well as offering pain relief.
Dr Lakhani says, 'The resulting blood flow to the genitals is beneficial to the physical health too, and can have a positive impact on the tissue in the area. Many people find the idea of their partner masturbating sexually arousing. Whether that's when their partner is alone and they then tell you about itor in front of them, or while they also masturbate Masturbation Partner W as mutual masturbationit can be a really fun and sexy way to be intimate.
I basically can't get my partner to orgasm because of my disability, and sometimes that's disheartening. If you've ly been worried about your partner masturbating, but want to accept this is a good and healthy thing for them to do, it's worth trying mutual masturbation. Here are two of Fox's simple ways to masturbate together, one's for the extroverts and Masturbation Partner W for the shyer among you:.
As well as being an educational exercise, this can be deeply erotic,' says Fox. Here's how:. Feeling nervous while masturbating together is totally natural, so if you're feeling timid, ask them to watch you through a half-open door. Parenting Mental health Healthy eating Conditions Follow. Type keyword s to search. AaronAmat Getty Images. Why do people masturbate? There are many reasons why people masturbate, including: Sexual pleasure Orgasms Stress relief Self-exploration Self-care 'Masturbation is a form of self pleasure and self-care and in some ways can offer us different elements to having sex with another person,' says psychosexual therapist and sex therapist for LELOKate Moyle.
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